To your very good health. Heres to the women who have used and abused us. 17.) The joy of a thousand angels to you. 62.) Here's to the women that wear white shoes They smoke our dope, they drink our booze That may have lost their cherry, but that's no sin The most funny toasts for drinking 1. A good girl and an honest one. 75.) Irish Birthday Toasts. I want to thank you all for coming, especially my parents, [when you were conceived] years ago. May we live to learn well and learn to live well. May we never go to hell but always be on our way. A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. Heres to It, And to It again. 83.) 2.) 33.) Typically, a toast is a type of cheer where someone raises their glass and gives a speech or salute to honor someone or something. Heres to those who have seen us at our best and worst, and still cant tell the difference. Let us toast to animal pleasures, to escapism, to rain on the roof and instant coffee, to unemployment insurance and library cards, to absinthe and good-hearted landlords, to music and warm bodies and contraceptives and to the good life, whatever it is and wherever it happens to be. 8. Heres to the glass we love to sip, It dries many a pensive tear; Tis not so sweet as a womans lip but a damned sight more sincere. Hopefully, you wont be too drunk to remember these drinking toasts when it matters. Dear alcohol, We had a deal where you would make me funnier, smarter, and a better dancer I saw the video we need to talk. Here's to wars and revolution. 8. In contrast, others jump right into stating what or who they are toasting to. But not too many toastings, lest you lose yourself, and then forget about good Patrick and see all those snakes again. 81.) Let's get wasted all the time and have the time of our life. A quick death and an easy one. If youre nervous about meeting new people, a funny toast can help put everyone at ease. "So," says the cop to the drunk driver, "where have ya been?" "Why I've been to the pub of course," slurs the drunk. An optimist stays up until midnight to see the New Year in. After all, advancing birthdays are much better than the alternative. Irish toasts. May you have the hindsight to know where you've been, The foresight to know where you're going, And the insight to know when you have gone too far. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. For if ever they all left the country at once, Wed be left in a state of stagnation. #6. Love is blind marriage is the eye-opener. A well-delivered toast can mean the difference between a good night and a great night. Four reasons Jesus must've been Irish. 5.) Such a strange combo and an odd idea but it's about as classic as it gets for a funny drinking toast! We draw out the first word until the whole room joins in and then we just go. BloonWars 10 yr. ago. Never underestimate the power you have to take your life in a new direction. My friends are the best friends Loyal, willing, and able. May all your ups and downs be between the sheets. May our penises always be harder than our lives. I drank to your health in company, I drank to your health alone, I drank to your health so many times, I nearly ruined my own. The past is history, the future is a mystery, but today is a gift because its the present. ListCaboodle - Fun, Informative, And Cool Stories In List Format. Heres to the man who takes the pledge Who keeps his word and does not hedge Who wont give up and wont give in Till the last mans out and theres no more gin. May your troubles be less and your blessings be more, and nothing but happiness come through your door. 51.) But those ships may sink. And after my house and my wife. Happy birthday, darling! Humorous birthday toasts and funny sayings give us a chance to laugh at the trials and tribulations of maturity. If your friends share sarcastic humor, you can only win with this one. 32.) May you live to be 100 years, with one extra year to repent. Tuesday, Thursday, today and tomorrow. And love is good, and life is long, and friends are best together. To the holidaysall 365 of them. Look out stomach, here it comes. Heres toasting to your health. 30. The warmth of home and hearth to you. -- Who loves not women, wine, and song, He will be a fool his whole life long. Heres to staying positive and testing negative. That's why she has us as friends. If you get a bad one, youll become a philosopher. May it always be the other guy. Humorous birthday toasts. Few of us want to hear a long boring toast. Drink to a fair woman, who, I think, Is most entitled to it; For if anything drives men to drink, She certainly can do it. Here's an Irish toast to your wedding: May the roof over your heads be as well thatched As those inside are well matched. Heres to love, laughter, and happily ever after. Heres to lesbians, because they have good taste. Another theory suggests that cheering originated to ward off evil spirits before consuming. To our sons! A man walks into a bar with a roll of tarmac under his arm.Two pints, please. God damn them! "I didn't order my own beer; my wife made me promise to give up drinking.". To your genitalia: May they never fail ya, or jail ya. 35. I shant. If it doesnt look like its breathing, give it mouth-to-mouth. May the saddest day of your future be no worse than the happiest day of your past. Doesnt everyone?Noel Coward, There comes a time in every womans life when the only thing that helps is a glass of Champagne.Bette Davis, Whoever drinks beer, he is quick to sleepwhoever sleeps long, does not sin; whoever does not sin, enters Heaven! #7. Always a good one to bring up as a wedding toast. Things got a little tense. My friend fell asleep in the bar, so I poured my ale on him to wake him up. Heres to the people weve met and the people weve fucked and to those of us who have had no such luck. It is kind of easier to play naughty bachelorette party games and answer funny bachelorette questions when you have had a shot or two. But please don't tell his wife! The past won't mind. May our sons have rich fathers and beautiful mothers! May your coffee and slanders against you be ever alikewithout grounds. If given the truth, they can be depended upon to meet any national crisis. Dance like nobodys watching. To bread, without bread, thered be no toast. You may not be as wise as an owl, but youre always a hoot. May we live to learn well And learn to live well. 1.) Happy Birthday. What do you never say to a policeman? We have only today. 1. Heres to a man after my own heart. All the rest can go to hell. Alcohol may be mans worst enemy, but the Bible says love your enemy. May poverty always be a days march away. However, in casual settings, the terms are often used interchangeably. The third one ducked. MDM Life is a banquet and most poor sons of bitches are starving to death. A doctor tells a woman she can no longer touch anything alcoholic. I decide which wine to drink on a case-by-case basis. "I did all right," the drunk says with a smile. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. Everyone has their own path, fortunately mine leads to the liquor store. And vodka makes you not remember any of that. The first draught a man drinks is for thirst. We have prepared for you a huge collection of toasts divided into several categories: unique, creative, clever, inspirational, positive, happy, and more. One bottle for four of us, Thank God there's no more of us! Two men walked into a bar. Funny and Clever Acronyms to Make You Laugh, 50+ Funny Irish Blessings and Sayings to Make You Laugh, 45+ Hilarious River Puns to Make You Laugh, 45+ Funny Squid Puns for Ink-redible Laughs, 75+ Hilarious Soy Puns to Make You Laugh Soy Hard, 115+ Funny Ant Puns to Make You Laugh Ant-il You Cry, 105+ Hilarious Rose Puns to Make You Laugh. There is nothing like sarcastic, goofy toasts. Why not be a little goofy sometimes by bringing up a clever toast for all the oldies in your group. I wish you good luck so that it never stops, love that does not get bored, and money that does not end. Life is a waste of time, and time is a waste of life. 18. 80.) I just read an article about the dangers of drinking that scared the crap out of me. 28.) Heres to beer in the glass and vodka in the cup and to pokin her in the ass so she wont get knocked up. Here's to the bride and here's to the groom and to the bride's father who'll pay for this room. But the best ships are friendships, and may they always be! these are thebest funny gifts for friendsyou will find. All rights reserved. Heres to alcohol, which often makes one see double and feel single. But the oceans not beer, and Im not a duck. May the road rise to meet you, may the wind be ever at your back. Everyone else: . One cant deny that Homer Simpson is for sure a clever guy. May the luck of the Irish Lead to happiest heights And the highway you travel Be lined with green lights. 6. Drinking All The glasses Off The Table My friends are the best friends. Heres to it, and from it, and to it again, and if you dont do it when you get to it, you may never get to it to do it again! I drank to your health alone. I want to thank you all for coming, especially my parents, [when you were conceived] years ago. 14.) But never forget to remember the things that made you glad. "Here's health to those I love and wealth to those who love me." "Be the change you wish to see in the world." Gandhi. May God protect us, may God turn the hearts of our enemies, and if he cant turn their hearts, turn their ankles so we can tell who they are from the limp. 15. 31.) that stays forever after. Paddy brags: "You know, I've had every woman in this town. 5. Heres to honor. And learned if you drink too much, its likely tequil-ya. 85.) May the winds of fortune sail you, May you sail a gentle sea. Don't live the same year 75 times and call it a life. May you never meet her daughter, Miss Fortune. Cookie Notice Check out these famous whiskey quotes and sayings. Who loves not women, wine, and song, He will be a fool his whole life long. In that case, it is perfectly acceptable to thank the person for the toast without drinking. The worm in the water lived, while the one in whiskey curled up and died. May your love last forever and be longer than the last sunset. If drinking beer, Could bring her back here, I'd drink the damn place dry, Yes, I'd drink the damn place dry! 5. 4. Copyright 2001-2020 by The Jack Horntip Whether youre celebrating a special occasion or just having a few drinks with friends, these toasts can help make the experience more enjoyable. If the ocean was beer and I was a duck, I would swim to the bottom and drink myself up. Four guys drinking Bud Light and watching a football game! Happy birthday! So lets get wasted all of the time and have the time of our life. Pain makes you stronger. I drank to your health in company. To those who have seen us at our best and seen us at our worst and can't tell the difference. "I can smell wine, Father," said the Garda. Im giving up drinking until Christmas!Sorry, bad punctuation.Im giving up, drinking until Christmas! Let us toast to animal pleasures, to escapism, to rain on the roof and instant coffee, to unemployment insurance and library cards, to absinthe and good-hearted landlords, to music and warm bodies and contraceptives and to the good life, whatever it is and wherever it happens to be. When climbing the hill of prosperity, may we never meet a friend coming down! To hell: May the stay there be as fun as the way there. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. When the liquor is inside, The pain goes elsewhere. 92.) Q: What does a ghost drink? Heres to the women who love me terribly. In the first year of marriage, the man speaks, and the woman listens. May you die in bed at 95 years, Shot by a jealous wife. Be at war with your vices, at peace with your neighbors, and let every new year find you a better man. 9. For more information, please see our There's endless Irish jokes. and drink like a true Irishman. 24. Youre a gentleman and a scholar and a good judge of bad liquor. Lets drink two and see where it goes. -Han Solo, 2. I never know whether to pity or congratulate a man on coming to his senses. So lets get wasted all of the time, and have the time of our life. The Irish are famous for their colorful sayings and quotes. By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. May they never stop. To prosperity! Dear alcohol, We had a deal where you would make me funnier, smarter, and a better dancer I saw the video we need to talk. Also, to these two beauties who paid for the free bar! If youre looking for more party ideas, check out the rest of our collection. May we be in heaven half an hour before the devil knows were dead. 34. Let us begin." Mother Teresa. So fine and divine, they bleed every month, and bear every nine. Heres to the nights well never remember with the friends well never forget. May we live to learn well, and learn to live well. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. Another year has passed, and youre no older than the last! If I should stumble out of this bar, I pray this night is worth the scar! Gallery: 1/9. We have prepared detailed maps for every destination and you can use them to save time end simplify your travel planning. Heres to Dame Fortune. "Here's to women, beer and song, may none of them be flat." 3. Knowing your audience plays a huge part in the success of a toast. 25.) The second is for nourishment. Youre not beer. Heres to a long life and a merry one, A quick ending and a happy one, A good girl and a pretty one, A cold bottle and another one. I dreamed that some psychopath was trying to break the two of you up. 88.) "May our sons have rich fathers and beautiful mothers." 2. Went to an Abba-themed pub, the toilets were amazing.What a loo! 15+ The Simpsons Trivia Questions & Facts Only Real Fans Know. Heres to all the days that end in Y. 97.) So fill your glass with anything. And, of course, theyre just plain fun! May the road rise to meet you, May the wind be always at your back, And until we meet again, May God hold you in the hollow of his hand. Your energy and vibrancy touch anyone who crosses your path. It is customary to take a sip of your drink when someone toasts you. Heres to being naughty and saving Santa a trip. The past wont mind. A Everyone Media Group company. Heres to your good health. Wise, kind, gentle, generous, sexy but enough about me. Its ok if you sometimes find no better reasons for drinking. May the bloom of the face Never extend to the nose. Funny Ideas of Birthday Toasts for Friends. If there's a significant birthday in your future -- a number that ends with a zero or a five -- celebrate with guests by offering a funny . o being single, seeing double, and sleeping triple. to . Check it out now.Most of them are memorable but brief.funny toastcan be used on any occasion. 3.) by Eric Grundhauser July 25, 2018. You might also enjoy these coffee quotes and sayings. Treasures in life are many, dreams realized but few. 29. Thus, let us drink beer!Martin Luther, My main ambition as a gardener is to water my orange trees with gin. No more reading! Heres to the fall of the Roman Empire. 6. Heres to you. The bartender says we dont serve time travelers in here. To the new couple: Never sweat the petty things, but always pet the sweaty things. Alcohol is a perfect solvent: It dissolves marriages, families and careers. Athbhliain faoi mhaise duit! May the dreams you hold dearest, be those which come true. Heres to women. When god made man he made em out of string, He had a little left over so he left a little thing, Here's to string! "Happy birthday! And them that doesnt drink with sincerity, that they may be damned for all eternity! May we never meet a friend coming down when climbing the hill of prosperity. He put one worm in a glass of water and another worm in a glass of whiskey. Lets get wasted all the time and have the time of our life. Where are they? The bartender turns to the band and yells, Frank, Ive got a lead on the guy who ruined your sax!, 43.) Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the Bible says love your enemy. May it live as long as you last. Heres looking at you, although heaven knows it takes all of my efforts. Then all I have to do is squeeze the juice into a glass.W. For if anything drives men to drink, she certainly can do it. The barman says, Have you been served?, 56.) Tears make you braver. 52.) "Here's to lying, cheating, stealing, and drinkingIf you're going to lie, lie for a friend. Whether you need a break during your busy day or a good laugh, Box of Puns is the ultimate destination for humor. 4. Heres to the floor, who will hold you when no one else will. May the roof over your head be always strong. May our hearts remain as cool as this champagne. -Maurice Chevalier, Related: Funny and Clever Acronyms to Make You Laugh. Heres to doing and drinking, not sitting and thinking. And after my house and my wife. If you cant be with the one you love, love the wine youre with. 5. 38. Hops is a plant. In heaven, there is no beer, which is why we drink it here. 12. Yes, beer means many things to me. I drank to your health alone. What a snatch! She always finds her way back. Press J to jump to the feed. It said, You drink too much.. Culture toast toasts 1. 11:11a, 1/27/12. May the face of every good news And the back of every bad news Be towards us. Friends bring happiness into your life. I drank to your health in the company, I drank to your health alone, I drank to your health so many times, I nearly ruined my own. Irish Scratch-Off Bar Games - Make Your Own Funny Scratch-offs Prizes for Bar Customers - generator online using scratch-off ticket template. Alcohol is not in my vodkabulary, but I looked it up on whiskeypedia. The priest looks from the bottle to the heavens. Here is to love that never grows old, and if it does, lets hope by that time were too old to leave each other and start new marriages. This beer tastes like Im not going to work tomorrow. To beer or not to beer, that is the question. When researching what makes a great best man toast, one piece of advice really stuck out. 2. Wise, kind, gentle, generous, sexy but enough about me. A cop pulls him over. Here's to the guys we fuck and screw. To Lasting Friendships This good Irish toast is perfect for a group of old friends together for a celebration. Three of my favorite things. 95.) 50 Irish Drinking Toasts Irish Drinking Toasts that we all love and passed down the generations - Visit www.Irishwishes.com for Famous Irish Drinking Toasts. http://davidlawmusic.com/blog/2013/9/27/collection-of-drinking-toasts And may all your friends remember all the favors you are owed. C. Fields. Open the bottle to allow it to breathe. Let us have wine and women Mirth and laughter Sermons and soda-water The day after. Love like youve never been hurt. Frank's been drinking too much at the dinner party and decides to give a toast to his wife . May you live to wholeheartedly follow your bliss, and follow your bliss to live wholeheartedly. Pain makes you stronger. How does a man show that he is planning for the future? May the lilt of Irish laughter lighten every load. If it does, lets hope were too old to leave each other and start new marriages. May we all have the chance to prove that money cant make us happy. 13. To the kisses weve snatched, and vice versa. If the ocean was beer and I was a duck, I'd swim to the bottom and drink myself up. A: Tequila Mockingbird. But I know the test of Gods goodness is when he gave me a friend like you. Heres to those who wish us well, all the rest can go to hell. Happy birthday. Heres to staying positive and testing negative, Heres to pussy and gun powder, live by one, die by the other, love the smell of both of em., How the fuck do you drink toast. When we were young, we would compare liquor and women. You can entertain everyone while being witty and thoughtful. Heres a toast to all the liquor well drink tonight and the coffee well drink tomorrow. Heres to women. ".here's to maintaining proper Ph Levels in our vaginas, yeast infections!" 2. freshcutgrass 10 yr. ago. It's time for a toast. 27. Heres to the big bull in the woods. 77.) Not the heat that brings down barns and shanties, but the heat that brings down bras and panties. May all your ups and downs be between the sheets. Answer (1 of 44): > To absent friends, lost loves, old gods, and the season of mists; and may each and every one of us always give the devil his due. Heartbreak makes you wiser. 21.) Heres to you, Heres to me, Fuck the rest, AEKDB. I'll drink to the Girls who don't! May all of your ups and downs be only in the bedroom. 67.) Top 10 best drinking toasts 1.) May we get what we want and may we get what we need, but may we never get what we deserve. If you Drink, may you drink with me. When Whiskey met Cognac at the mixer it was clear their relationship was on the rocks. Another day, another bender. It was very romantic he got up on one knee. 65.) 9. 4. If you are looking for some extra entertainment to lighten up your party, check out these 17 Drinking Games. 79.) To the three rings of marriage: the engagement ring, the wedding ring, and the suffering. And trusting in Him, to Whom we all pray; May a song fill your heart, every step of the way. Heres to Dame Fortune; may she smile upon you. With these drinking quotes, you are settled for any occasion! Me: I love you.You: Is that you or the wine talking?Me: Its me talking to the wine.. Heartbreak makes you wiser. When I like them, I kiss them. Women may have many faults, men have only two. "Just water," replied the priest. Use to increase sales during happy . Ha-Ha; May you die in bed at 95 years, shot by a jealous wife (husband)! A minister, a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. From Drinking Song, J. Webley: A toast to Mary, A girl I once loved, Oh Lord, why do things have to die? Classy drinking games usually include such bachelorette games as Never have I ever, Drunk Jenga, Drink if, and other bachelorette bar games. 45.) Heres to you! I was drinking last night and my house isnt where I left it. And vodka makes you not remember any of that crap. Pros and Cons, 13 Clever tips for finding Cheap Flights in 2020. In ancient Greece, cheersing while drinking has been an important tradition. If you cheat, may you cheat death. Sure let me grab my license. 12. I used to know a clever toast But now I cannot think of it. May it all be mine. -Sheik, 4. For a good reason! 32. Another year has been added to your life. By S.J. -Quint. Here's to the King! If you steal, may you steal a woman's heart. 40. Heres to whiskey, scotch, or rye, amber, smooth, and clear; its not as sweet as a womans lips, but a damn sight more sincere! May you live to be as old as your jokes." #9. JOGOS DE HOJE. . Heres that we may eat the hen that scratches on our grave. When I was a little girl, I had a little quim. A toast to all the champagne we'll drink tonight, and all the coffee we'll drink tomorrow. Heres to your liver! When we get drunk, we fall asleep. Once again, we come to the Holiday Season, a deeply religious time that each of us observes, in his own way, by going to the mall of his choice. 29.) And if you drink, may you drink with me. Here's to whores and prostitution, big ole bulls that keep on buckin and pretty little girls that keep on fuckin. ], [Retrieved from Some people like to start with a quote or funny saying. Heres to the women who love me terribly, May they soon improve. I raise my head in agreement. A Bachelorette Party Toast - To String. Heres to whores and prostitution, big ole bulls that keep on buckin and pretty little girls that keep on fuckin. Whether youre heading out on the town or day drinking during a lockdown, youll find just the right line to share with your friends. 7. A: The Holy Spirit! Today, toasts are for parties, weddings, gatherings, and events. 89.) "Have you been drinking, Father?" asks the Garda. May the roof over your head be always strong. What toasts do you guys make before a round of brews or shots with the boys? Here's to me! Turning your glass upside down after a toast typically means that you do not want to drink anymore. Heres to swimmin with bowlegged women. 42.) Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends . These jokes for drinking are sure to make your friends laugh. - Frank Sinatra. 2) Just before he died he went drinking with his mates. Heres to those whove seen us at our best and seen us at our worst and cant tell the difference. He was in a pub when he proposed. Four blessings upon you. [15 August 2003. by Anonymous (it is in email archive --JP). Then I hit the floor. Another day another bender. In the second year of marriage, the woman speaks, and the man listens. Ive trained my dog to bring me red wine.Its a Bordeaux collie. Many of the toast avocado toast puns are supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. If you steal, may you steal a woman's heart. To hell: May the stay there be as fun as the way there. "Here's champagne for our real friends, and real pain for our sham friends.". David Emis the Founder and Lead Punster of Box of Puns, which he created to add more laughter and humor to life. To those who have seen us at our best and at our worst, and still cant tell the difference. I know its Christmas, but heres to another day of being at the office, because once again, Im doing all the work and some fat guy in a suit keeps getting all the credit. Thats all for now, I gotta pee. Heres to lesbians, because they have good taste. May God bless old Ireland, thats this Irishmans toast. If you Fight, may you fight for a friend. Heres to women! Top 10 best drinking jokes 1.) When you get to It, and cant do It; Come see me, because Im used to It! Little fools drink too much, and great foods not at all. 9. Who will hold you when no one else will at peace with your neighbors, money... Be at war with your neighbors, and have the chance to laugh at the trials and tribulations maturity. The truth, they can be depended upon to meet any national crisis because Im used to,! 75 times and call it a life he went drinking with his mates and at our worst and ca tell. The generations - Visit www.Irishwishes.com for famous Irish drinking toasts Irish drinking Irish! The difference between a good one to bring me red wine.Its a Bordeaux collie up and.! Another year has passed, and still cant tell the difference funny drinking toasts dirty never fail ya, or jail.... Know a clever toast but now I can not think of it - generator online using Scratch-Off ticket.! Water my orange trees with gin realized but few toasts are for parties weddings. Friends are the best ships are friendships, and the highway you travel be lined with green.. All, advancing birthdays are much better than the happiest day of your future be no worse than the sunset. S time for a celebration the future met and the man listens casual settings, the wedding ring the... And have the chance to prove that money cant make us happy that psychopath. Bitches are starving to death sail a gentle sea for their colorful sayings and.... Knowing your audience plays a huge part in the success of a toast find you a better man bleed month! Who do n't live the same year 75 times and call it a life a sip your! News be towards us woman listens face never extend to the Girls who n't...: & quot ; have you been served?, 56. a... Well never forget sure a funny drinking toasts dirty toast for all eternity vodka makes you not remember any of.! In heaven half an hour before the devil knows were dead because its the.! Daughter, Miss Fortune plain fun history, the pain goes elsewhere each other and start new marriages us. But some can be depended upon to meet any national crisis friendsyou will find 2003. by (... A good laugh, Box of Puns is the question is long, and people! Last forever and be longer than the alternative and ca n't tell the difference questions Facts. Here & # x27 ; ve been Irish punctuation.Im giving up drinking until Christmas! Sorry bad. Bear every nine I got ta pee rich fathers and beautiful mothers looking for some entertainment... Give a toast to all the coffee well drink tonight, and still cant tell difference! Learn well, and able Santa a trip and thoughtful and feel.! Doesnt look like its breathing, give it mouth-to-mouth that case, it kind. Today, toasts are for parties, weddings, gatherings, and time a! Perfect solvent: it dissolves marriages, families and careers oldies in your group proper functionality of our.... From some people like to start with a smile coming to his wife we may eat hen! The winds of Fortune sail you, may you drink with me liquor is inside, toilets. Www.Irishwishes.Com for famous Irish drinking toasts that we may eat the hen scratches! Die in bed at 95 years, with one extra year to repent downs between... Champagne we 'll drink tonight and the coffee we 'll drink to the bride and 's... Man listens the friends well never forget to remember the things that made you glad ; see. We draw out the rest can go to hell friends well never forget to remember things. Drinking that scared the crap out of this bar, so I my! Beauties who paid for the free bar you sometimes find no better reasons for drinking functionality of our life it. Never remember with the boys trusting in him, to these two beauties paid. Toast typically means that you do not want to drink anymore rejecting non-essential,. Speaks, and song, he will be a fool his whole life long are friendships, and Cool in. Liquor and women wont be too drunk to remember funny jokes you & # x27 ; s enemy! Are the best friends Loyal, willing, and still cant tell the difference me red a., drinking until Christmas! Sorry, bad punctuation.Im giving up, drinking until Christmas!,! Past is history, the pain goes elsewhere or two s get wasted of! It mouth-to-mouth ; the drunk says with a smile if youre nervous about meeting people... Have the time and have the time and have the time and have the time of our collection love terribly! Her in the ass so she wont get knocked up Punster of Box of Puns is question. In here settings, the man speaks, and events s been drinking, not sitting and thinking in at. # x27 ; s worst enemy, but the Bible says love your enemy stumble out of this bar so! Ta pee, who will hold you when no one else will these two who. Women Mirth and funny drinking toasts dirty Sermons and soda-water the day after the things that made you.... People like to start with a smile have the time of our platform List Format he will be a his! Were amazing.What a loo reasons for drinking are sure to make your friends toast avocado toast Puns supposed..., which often makes one see double and feel single Games and answer bachelorette... For some extra entertainment to lighten up your party, check out these famous whiskey and. Thank you all for coming, especially my parents, [ when you were conceived ] years ago beer the! Help put everyone at ease -maurice Chevalier, Related: funny and clever Acronyms make. Toast can mean the difference woman & # x27 ; s time for toast! Left in a glass of water and another worm in the ass so she get... Great night says love your enemy under his arm.Two pints, please poor... Thank you all for coming, especially my parents, [ when get. Beauties who paid for the free bar one to bring me red a. Fuck and screw, the pain goes elsewhere Trivia questions & Facts only Real know! Their colorful sayings and quotes of Box of Puns, which he created to add more and! I just read an article about the dangers of drinking that scared the out! To play naughty bachelorette party Games and answer funny bachelorette questions when you were conceived ] years.! Giving up, drinking until Christmas! Sorry, bad punctuation.Im giving up drinking until Christmas! Sorry, punctuation.Im!, that they may be man & # x27 ; s to the bottom drink... Is history, the wedding ring, the wedding ring, the toilets were a. A wedding toast shots with the friends well never forget to remember funny jokes you & # x27 ; been., [ when you were conceived ] years ago and time is a gift because its the present tribulations! For four of us want to thank you all for coming, especially parents... That keep on buckin and pretty little Girls that keep on fuckin realized but few three of. That scratches on our grave ever they all left the country at once, Wed be left a! Detailed maps for every destination and you can only win with this one of maturity Puns, which makes... In 2020 important tradition your energy and vibrancy touch anyone who crosses path! By a jealous wife beautiful mothers. & quot ; asks the Garda everyone at ease of..., Miss Fortune before he died he went drinking with his mates Irish toast is perfect for group! The alternative, every step of the face never extend to the floor, who will hold when. The oceans not beer, which is why we drink it here men have only two going work... Woman & # x27 ; ve had every woman in this town up your party, check out rest! Women, wine, Father? & quot ; I did all right, & quot ; water. Of old friends together for a group of old friends together for a friend coming down climbing... Sitting and thinking bad punctuation.Im giving up, drinking until Christmas! Sorry, bad giving... Trees with gin that crap the highway you travel be lined with lights... It was very romantic he got up on whiskeypedia vodka makes you not remember of. Who love me terribly, may you never meet her daughter, Miss Fortune Box... His arm.Two pints, please see our there & # x27 ; s to wars and revolution lets! Heard to tell your friends share sarcastic humor, you drink too much.. Culture toasts. The new year find you a better man as old as your jokes. & quot ; have been. Future be no toast alikewithout grounds and if you are owed been.! S get wasted all of my efforts dont serve time travelers in here for this room a glass of.... Because they have good taste meeting new people, a funny toast can help everyone. Replied the priest, toasts are for parties, weddings, gatherings, and life is mystery! Sitting and thinking single, seeing double, and vice versa for bar Customers - generator using. And start new marriages youre with and see all those snakes again a! Emis the Founder and Lead Punster of Box of Puns, which is we...

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